Unrequited Puppy Love
by StromLantern
Summary: Alfred had always loved Mathieu.  Sadly, Mathieu did not return his affections. Read: Kneed him where it hurts   When he was sixteen, he finally got permission to court him.  Featuring snarky!slightlystuckup!Mathieu,inlove!Alfred.  Both are princes.  AU.


This is a story of unrequited love.

A story of two princes brought together by luck, by trial and by fate.

A story of love sprung from hate

A story of puppy love and of something more.

A story of love transcribed to lore.

Two kingdoms had a prince at the same time. One, the northern island kingdom known as England had a prince whom the king Arthur named Alfred. Another, the continental country of France, whose king was Francis, had a prince named Mathieu. The kings both loved their sons very much. Sadly, Alfred's mother died during childbirth and Mathieu's died shortly after he was born in a riding accident.

Still, the boys grew up with as much happiness as any other boy their age and when they were six, they finally met. The two acted like long lost siblings and played together all day. But needless to say, Francis was surprised when Alfred came up to him and asked for Matthew's hand in marriage. Arthur wondered where Alfred had learned such things and was surprised when Francis said yes. He had meant it as a joke, something of no consequence that Alfred would forget in a year or a day, knowing his absolutely minuscule attention span. But when Alfred brought a contract for him to sign the next day written messily in crayon, they didn't know what to do. Francis ended up signing the contract for no other reason then the fact known only too well, that Alfred threw horrible tantrums. While most children stopped about the age of four, Alfred still threw them and being a prince who almost always got his way didn't help.

After that, the worried fathers had considered it obligatory to separate the two. They didn't meet again until they were ten. When French peasants lined the streets, shouting for a republic and death to the king and Francis had been decapitated by the guillotine, a humane method to kill, and the monarchy replaced in France. Mathieu had survived through the help of loyal servants, who had placed the prince in a crate and shipped him to England. Mathieu had climbed out of the crate in the most dignified way possible and demanded with a slight French accent but perfect English and in the haughty manner he had emulated from the French Court to be taken to the king immediately. When he had arrived at the palace slightly worse for wear, Arthur was amazed that the boy was still alive but Alfred, who ever since he had heard of the brouhaha in France, had been worried out of his mind for the boy. This chain of events led to Alfred running to hug Mathieu. He was spurned when as he reached for a hug, Mathieu kneed him in the fork of his legs. Alfred fell over clutching the afflicted area and Mathieu sauntered off. When Arthur questioned him later his only response was "That is what Papa told me to do if someone I didn't want was getting too close." Arthur just sighed, of course Francis would teach his son that at the age of ten. Mathieu continued, "If Alfred wants to marry me, then he must court me, the proper way. At the age of sixteen, he may start. I would prefer him to get Papa's permission before he started but as that is not possible, I will take the contract as license."

After that, Alfred was cautious around the Mathieu. He stayed a close distance away but was always trying to impress him with tricks and accomplishments, Mathieu stayed unimpressed. Arthur had decided not to tell Alfred of the instructions Mathieu had left for him. Arthur hoped that Alfred were forget about the little puppy love he had and move on but it was not so.

When some visiting prince from the Netherlands had been caught kissing Mathieu, Alfred threw him into the moat. Alfred made the excuse that Mathieu had gotten high of the drugs that no doubt the other prince was smoking and that he wasn't completely responsible for his actions. After many apologies, the prince left and to Alfred's delight, never came back. The next incident that occurred was when Mathieu was fifteen. It was rumored that Mathieu was seeing the brash albino from Germany. When Alfred confronted the albino about the rumors and his only response was a smirk, it had led to a fight. Eventually the two boys had been dragged apart by some guards and taken to separate rooms. The only one left was Mathieu who was sitting nearby innocently reading a book like nothing was happening. Alfred, however, stayed faithful to Mathieu and no matter how much the shogun's son from Japan tried to seduce him while wearing a kimono, he refused.

The one comfort Alfred had, that give him just a bit of hope that Mathieu considered him better than all of the nameless flings was that once a year, on the anniversary of his father's death, Mathieu would run to Alfred for comfort. The first time this had happened, it had been a stormy night. Alfred had been a little scared as he hated thunder storms, not that he would admit it, being the prince of the kingdom and all. Just as a thunder flash illuminated the room, Mathieu appeared in the door way. Alfred would refuse to admit, he thought he was a ghost at first, Alfred was scared of ghosts, badly. Mathieu was as pale as a ghost though and the way he had just appeared like that freaked him out, plus his face was shining wet with tears. Luckily, he noticed it was Matthieu before he screamed.

"Can I sleep with you?" The boy asked, wrapping his arms around himself protectively.

"Sure," the boy asked trying to figure out whether there was something else to say. Mathieu walked to his bed slowly, clambered on, and buried his head into Alfred's chest. Quiet sobs wracked his body as Alfred tried to stay as still as possible, which was a difficult feat for him. The next morning, Alfred woke up to find that Mathieu was gone, with only a indentation in the bedding and a tear- stained shirt to prove that he was even there in the first place. This happened continuously over the next six years. When they were fifteen, the new maid thought Alfred had finally succeeded and squealed about it to all the maids, before she was told that it happened every year, nothing happened, and Mathieu might have only run to Alfred's room because it was the nearest and not from any personal preference.

On Mathieu's sixteenth birthday, which happened to lie three days before Alfred's, Mathieu received a set of books from Arthur and a live polar bear cub, imported from the Arctic, from Alfred. He had also received a bouquet of tulips but Alfred threw out before Mathieu could see. Mathieu carried the polar bear and a book from the set with him everywhere. And Alfred took that as evidence that Mathieu was finally starting to reciprocate his feelings. Arthur finally gave up on Alfred ever finding a nice girl, maybe the feisty princess from Spain, and having a boy to continue the throne so it wouldn't go to the Arthur's older brothers and whatever children they managed to have, if they managed to have any and then of course under them, the kingdom would run itself into the ground. After all, there was a reason why their father had not chosen the two older brothers, instead the youngest one was monarch. Also, Arthur had half exiled them after too many drunken parties and his magic ritual was interrupted. So it would be a blow to his pride to have to call them back. But he didn't really see an alternative, unless of course Alfred would consent to marry that princess from Belgium who would accept a few affairs on the side as she would probably have more. The one problem with that is that Arthur could think of no way that Mathieu would consent to being a lover. Arthur finally decided to tell Alfred about Mathieu's instructions. Alfred had taken the news with great joy and so began the Arthur Kirkland Crash Course in Romance. Of course this was limited as the only things Arthur knew about courting someone was to recite Shakespeare and hope the other person topped. The Crash Course ended with Alfred calling him an old man and walking out. And in that dramatic way began Alfred's quest to court Mathieu.

~~~~Dun, dun, dadun, dun, dadun~~~~

First yaoi fic ever! Please don't ask where this story is coming from. I wanted a kind of stuck up Mathieu and Alfred chasing after him and then this came up. I tried to write it like a fairy tale. Hope that worked. I tried to make it as funny as possible. I hope you got all the cameos, they were pretty obvious. Netherlands- the prince with the tulips and pot, Prussia- the albino from Germany, Hungary-the maid, Japan- shogun's son, Mexico- the fiesty princess from Spain, Belgium- the princess from Belgium, Ireland and Scotland- two older brothers, I really think they were so obvious but anyway, those are there. Other notes

I know I suck at poetry. I had to think of something.

That was the French Revolution. If you need historical facts, check wikipedia. For the record, one of my catch phrases is "That was the biggest fail since the French revolution." So yeah.

I've wanted to write the word brouhaha in a story since I read Ranger's Apprentice.

Mathieu is a tad stuck up but I want to write him like that since he is Francis' son. And he was raised in French court.

This is AU obviously because Francis and Arthur were never kings and so on. Also Japan was isolated at this time so that could never happen. It took America going in there with the navy to get him to open up.

Just picture Kiku, in a kimono, trying to seduce someone. Strange mental picture. I was just trying to think of an America pairing besides AmeCan or USUK, neither possible. AmeCan just because well this whole fic is, and USUK because that's messed up. So yeah I came up with this.

I think that's it. Please tell me what you think. Remember first attempt at yaoi and I really need feedback. There should be like one more chapter and I would really like ideas on how Alfred should court Mathieu. Also tell me if the characters are too OOC, especially Mathieu.

Also I used Mathieu all the time because he was a French prince.

Review, please.


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